Lifeless

May. 3rd, 2010 07:21 pm
xrosepetalsx: (Ryeowook)
[personal profile] xrosepetalsx
I wrote this a while ago after giving Khue the prompt, and I was going to edit and try the prompt again, but well…yea. Just gonna post now. 731 words – I guess you could call this a writing exercise. Still working on the Haemin I owe dandanfung. School keeping me busy -_-

Title: Lifeless
Author: xrosepetalsx
Rating: Pg-13
Pairing: Kyusung (Kyuhyun/Yesung), Kyuwook, Undercurrents of KRY
Characters: KRY
Summary: I hate you Jongwoon, I hate you so fucking much. You’ve turned us all into monsters…
Disclaimer: I do not own.
Warning: Angst


It was almost like Ryeowook was the only one who noticed what Yesung was doing to Kyuhyun; no one else saw what he was seeing. There was no one but himself who looked on in despair as Yesung destroyed who Kyuhyun was, destroyed every aspect of his being; there was no one but himself who felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest.

He just wanted to scream, and often times he did…mentally; he just wanted to shake Kyuhyun’s shoulders and say Fight back, godamn you, fight back! with tears running down his cheeks.

What’s happening to you? Why are you like this…

His dreams were haunted by the image of Kyuhyun’s pale, gaunt face, so lifeless and drained of blood. He looked cold, indifferent; the remnants of who he once was could still be seen in his face, and perhaps that’s what fooled every one else – he still talked like himself, all snark and non-caring attitude, still had that smirk curving his lips – but if you looked in his eyes, there was nothing but broken despair.

He wasn’t Kyuhyun anymore, he was a doll. Yesung’s plaything. Nothing but easily maneuvered cloth arms, legs, body – where was the boy who only did what he wanted to do, and not what ever Yesung asked him to do?

Again, maybe that’s what fooled them all, though Ryeowook cut through the layers of deceit with ease, like a knife through butter – Kyuhyun still refused to do anything for anybody…except Yesung; which wasn’t strange in a relationship…except for the fact that it was Kyuhyun.

Sometimes, Ryeowook would glance over and see that one particular look on Kyuhyun’s face that would break his heart; that look that wasn’t even a pretense.

It was glassy, dazed eyes, and slack mouth. It was heavy breathing and trembling extremities. It was fear, it was sweat, it was confusion. It was the look of someone who was losing themselves.

You’re killing him! God Damn it, Yesung, look at him! Ryeowook would scream, all harsh breathing and scrunched up eyes, attempting to prevent the tears that threatened to fall. He’s not even Kyuhyun anymore, I don’t know what he is! You’ve created a fucking monster Yesung, what have you done!?

Yesung never listened, not even when the hot tears spilled and Ryeowook’s breathing got erratic; not even when Ryeowook begged him to stop, begged him to let him go.

What, so you can have him? Yesung would laugh. Do you really thing you would be better for him Ryeowook? He’d die under your hand just as quickly as he’s dying under mine. He was never meant to belong to someone – he was supposed to be free.

Then let him free.

I could never. He is mine.
His voice would be angry, and would hold a challenge that never ceased to make Ryeowook recoil. He could see so easily how Kyuhyun had lost himself to Yesung – the challenge would have been something Kyuhyun would never have backed down from, the voice disarming and so ready to engulf your soul the moment you let your guard down.

In reality, it didn’t matter how much Ryeowook loved Kyuhyun, because he would never get him back from Yesung. It was far, far too late, and if he pushed too hard, he feared one day, he would end up just like Kyuhyun.

Maybe it made Ryeowook a monster as well, but he couldn’t give himself up for Kyuhyun. He could never give himself up for anyone.

I hate you Jongwoon, I hate you so fucking much. You’ve turned us all into monsters… Every time he confronted Yesung, he felt his heart break just a little more, felt his will crumple slowly, and he knew, at one point, it would turn to dust and he would be in the hands of Yesung, a puppet as useless as Kyuhyun.

He knew he should give up, but he always came back. Watching Kyuhyun die little by little, knowing one day he would be totally broken, forced him to come back, even when he knew giving up would mean keeping his own sanity.

He knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that what he was doing was stupid, and he feared one day it would be too late, and he would lose himself just as surely as Kyuhyun had. But what could he do? He loved him.

Date: 2010-05-04 02:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saya19.livejournal.com
Spot~~~~
Hehhe. Ninja enough?
Probably not!!!!
Gahaha must read.
Take break from wretched studying~~~

Date: 2010-05-04 02:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saya19.livejournal.com
OMG Kyuhyun!!!!!
Nooooo!!! You must live.
NOOOOOO!!
Ryeowook help him! Please!!!
OMG. This is so sadddd.. And Yesung bad guy...
His passion got ahead of him
but Ryeowook...nooooo
But it's such a beautiful sadness.
Can feel the loveeee...

It's written so heartfelt.
I was screaming along with Ryeowook here.
And I want to like try to think okay, Yesung, you're not that bad but OMG
Kyuhyun...Lifeless...NOOOOOOO
Kyuhyun must wake and it was sad
when Ryeowook realized he can't save Kyuhyun.
That was sooo sad.
Because they realize that nothing can be done.
That it will go on this way.

-_-
T.T
>.<
T.T
>.<
T.T

Wahhh... but I'm glad you posted.
Even if it's broken!Kyuwook
I still love seeing the different forms of love between them. It's really beautiful.
And well written (very convincing)


Loves <333333333 To You LOTS!!!

Date: 2010-05-04 02:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOL <333 Thank you bb! I'm glad you liked it and I'm glad I managed to pull so many emotions out for you LOL. The next one won't be so bad, I promise. I do like the other sides of Kyuwook as well as they angst lol.

Date: 2010-05-04 02:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scevity.livejournal.com
I really need to get a life and stop refreshing the recent entries page of the kyuwook community.
He knew he should give up, but he always came back. Watching Kyuhyun die little by little, knowing one day he would be totally broken, forced him to come back, even when he knew giving up would mean keeping his own sanity.

He knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that what he was doing was stupid, and he feared one day it would be too late, and he would lose himself just as surely as Kyuhyun had. But what could he do? He loved him.


Gah, that was sad; but written very well. I really liked how you had Ryeowook actually try to stop Yesung instead of sitting in the emo corner and bemoaning Kyuhyun's fate.
 I think that a little piece of my Yesung bias broke off and died somewhere.

Date: 2010-05-04 02:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
NOOOO THAT WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN LOL I LOVE YESUNG /FAIL. THE IDEA ATE ME, I HAD TO WRITE THIS. POOR YESUNG, MY ANTAGONIST

Thank you! I'm really glad you liked this, I had fun working on it, even though it was just a writing exercise. And lol, yes, I generally don't like making my characters cry babies who do nothing to help their own case no matter how bad the way I phrased that sounded lol

The kyuwook comm is so busy lately lol. I remember, when I first started out here, there was hardly ever an update.

Date: 2010-05-04 02:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scevity.livejournal.com

It's fine, really, I can just go relive some of his worst fails
I can only stand so much of a weak Ryeowook. He is a man!  That sometimes transforms into a really pretty girl
Speaking of men, have you seen the teaser pics for Super Junior's comeback?
I know. When I said I was lurking for more than a while I meant it. A few days ago the community started spewing new entries out of nowhere. It was fantastical and lovely and I hope it never stops.


Date: 2010-05-04 10:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOL <3

I don't think Ryeowook would really be all that weak, just more susceptible to tears is all lol that makes a very convincing girl

I DIED LAUGHING AT THOSE. HYUK MAKES MY STOMACH HURT I LAUGH SO HARD! LOL at the rate it's still going, I don't think it will stop. It's nice that Kyuwook is finally getting some love ^^

Date: 2010-05-04 02:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hamilisha.livejournal.com
Oh my...heart wrenching. But, in the best way possible. (Though that may not make sense... lol) I really loved this. I felt so bad for Kyuhyun. Sitting there and allowing himself to become something beyond his own control. I must admit, I'm a little annoyed with Yesung at the moment. xD And Ryeowook trying his best to fight against Yesung was just something I didn't expect, but am happy happened. Thanks for sharing. ^^

Date: 2010-05-04 10:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOL I have to be proud it was heart wrenching in a good way, that means I did a good job putting forth the emotions I wanted to come out of this, but Kyu didn't actually let himself become something beyond his own control, more like the challenge Yesung emanates drew Kyuhyun in, and after he got sucked in, he started to lose himself little by little in Yesung's love...

Really? You didn't think Ryeowook would fight back? I don't know, personally I don't see Ryeowook as someone who would sit back lol. And I must agree, I am currently a little annoyed at my own portrayal of Yesung LOL.

Thanks for reading!

Date: 2010-05-05 01:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hamilisha.livejournal.com
I actually see that now. You wrote Yesung so well, he was able to manipulate and confuse me through the fic. lol

Well, not that he wouldn't fight back but, it's just a way I don't usually see him written. So it was a good contrast in character.:)
usually Kyuhyun has to come save him, which I do like but sometimes.....ehhh
I don't think he would sit back either. ^^

Date: 2010-05-05 03:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOL, don't worry. Writing exercise's leave room for a lot of controversy. I've gotten a lot of different views on this, and I liked a lot of them. Some people were Yesung sympathizers xDDD

Ahh, I get what you mean. I like putting my own little spin on characters, though I try not to stray too far from actual characterization D: It happens to everyone lol Soo true! I agree, sometimes, that plot device is awesome, but other times it's like >/ Wook could have saved himself! At least let him fight back a little!

Date: 2010-05-04 03:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewindchime.livejournal.com
Bb, I was so glad to see you're finally posting something. But but... This definitely broke my heart, idek ;_____;

But it's so perfectly written, I must say /still sobbing

Date: 2010-05-04 10:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
D: <3 /Huggles

I had a mini comeback with angst! /Feels bad. I'm coming back with more Kyuwook soon and it's not nearly so bad! But the Haemin for dandanfung comes first lol <3 I'm glad you thought I put it together well. Thank you so much bb!

Date: 2010-05-04 04:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oh-hesitate.livejournal.com
ihu and the fact that you put in the word play thing there and I was expecting sex but YOU COCKBLOCKER >:|||||

oh and fuck you for putting in unrequited love, you know it is one of my kinks ;A;

Date: 2010-05-04 10:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
Wait wait what word play thing? LOL Point it out to me! I didn't expect anyone to come up with the idea of sex in this! AND LOL I AM NOT A COCKBLOCKER

And you love me, you know it. This isn't the vampire!au I promised either, just so you know. Just something I found sitting around on my computer.

you loved it ;D

Date: 2010-05-05 07:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oh-hesitate.livejournal.com
I quote: He wasn’t Kyuhyun anymore, he was a doll. Yesung’s plaything 8||||||||||||||| COCKBLOCKER

and lol I know FINISH THAT GODDAMN AU

Date: 2010-05-05 03:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
ROFL ONLY YOU WOULD ZOOM IN ON THAT PART YOU WHORE <333

IM GETTING TO IT. I STILL OWE DANDANFUNG THE HAEMIN

Date: 2010-05-06 04:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oh-hesitate.livejournal.com
... shut up, it was relevant to my interests :

Date: 2010-05-06 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
Lol I love you

Date: 2010-05-04 05:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hennu15.livejournal.com
That was sad... Felt bad for Kyuhyun and ofc Ryeowook,
but I was more annoyed with Kyu than Yehsung, no idea why.. Aww, My Wookie T.T he must stay strong and not lose himself
Loved it, thank you:DD

Date: 2010-05-04 10:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
A YESUNG/RYEOWOOK SYMPATHIZER! I was wondering if someone would hate Kyuhyun rather then them. I think I can understand why you would be more annoyed with him - it does kind of come off as if he had completely stopped trying to save himself.

Thank you for reading!

Date: 2010-05-04 02:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bluefireflies.livejournal.com
Oh Ryeowook dear...this unrequited love is so hearbreaking T__T.
And Kyusung, why i feel pity for Yesung, he also didn't want to lose Kyuhyun(i just feel it's his way to express his love for Kyu)

This is awesome, you can tell so many emotion in just 731 words :D

Date: 2010-05-04 10:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
ANOTHER YESUNG SYMPATHIZER LOL <3 I'm glad some people got something different out of this. I like the idea you put forth in your comment. It's really just who Kyuhyun is - as I said, he was never supposed to be held back by anyone's love, but Yesung truly loved him! And that's why he couldn't let Kyuhyun go, because then it would only be someone else who would destroy him.

D: Sorry for mini rant LOL, but thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it and thank you for the compliment O///O

Date: 2010-05-04 09:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stripysockz.livejournal.com
Ahh so sad T_T

You write angst so beautifully, you always get the depth of the emotions across really strongly, and it's so believeable! I don't know whether I felt worse for Kyu being warped like that, or for Wookie for having to watch helplessly, but you wrote both of them so well, I loved it =)

Date: 2010-05-04 10:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
O//O Thank you! I feel really proud that I got this across well! Lol, I can't choose how to sympathize with more and I wrote this! I actually feel for Yesung too XDD Thank you for reading!

Date: 2010-05-04 10:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOL oops, I meant who, not how

Date: 2010-05-04 10:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] domolovesyou.livejournal.com
/late spot
what about that kyusung for meeee? :3

Date: 2010-05-04 10:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
IM GETTING TO IT /SOBBING <333 I will not forget! I love them <333

Date: 2010-05-04 10:53 pm (UTC)

Date: 2010-05-04 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] domolovesyou.livejournal.com
JONGWOON YOU MEANIEBUTT ;_________________________;
i loved this. BUT IT WAS SO AS;DLKFJA;LDKJ ;~~;
♥ ♥

Date: 2010-05-04 11:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOL BE A SYMPATHIZER!

ANOTHER YESUNG SYMPATHIZER LOL <3 It's really just who Kyuhyun is - as I said, he was never supposed to be held back by anyone's love, but Yesung truly loved him! And that's why he couldn't let Kyuhyun go, because then it would only be someone else who would destroy him.

From other comments kekeke :D I feel bad though D: I made Jonwoon the bad guy, and I LOVE HIM AND KYUSUNG LOL.

I'm glad you liked it ^^ Thanks for reading bb!

Date: 2010-05-05 12:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayshy.livejournal.com
is it wrong to say that i actually liked this yesung? 0__0
i mean, he loves kyu too much so he just wants him to himself... i feel bad for wookie though, but at the same time, he's not fighting hard enough. and kyu, he also loves yeusng, but he needs to know when to tell him to stop.

loved it!

Date: 2010-05-05 03:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
8DDD I love you and your thoughts. Writing exercise's beg for thoughts LOL. They way I portrayed Yesung and the very little information I put forth gives room for other people's thoughts on the whole thing. I can see it you're way just as well as I can see it the way I thought of it as I wrote it. Originally it was just the fact that Kyuhyun felt strangled in a relationship - that he just couldn't handle being stuck to one person and being sort of unable to be his own person. I don't know, I was going for the tied down angle, and Yesung loving him so much he'd rather be the one to take Kyu's life from him then let someone else do it, even Ryeowook.

Anyway, sorry for the mini rant LOL and thank you for reading! I'm glad you liked it!

Date: 2010-05-05 01:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] babycloud-ai.livejournal.com
Ah, it's seldom that I see Yesung as the villain. It's always him as the dorky one or the one being tormented or the weird hermit. I have to say it's kind of refreshing actually, pardon my bias, nothing can make me hate him since he's always the underdog but seriously, nobody deserves what Kyu's going through, wookie should just kick Yesung's ass and be done with.

Date: 2010-05-05 03:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
LOLOLOL <333 Yesung is one of my major bias's as well. I hate that he's always the 'stupid' one >/ or at least that's how he's usually portrayed. I love him, even if he is stubborn and possessive and faily at times xDD I like you're take one this, Wookie kicking Yesung's ass would be an interesting thing, wouldn't it? Anyway, thanks for reading and I'm glad you liked it!

Date: 2010-05-18 02:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charunde.livejournal.com
;A; NUWAI. YOU WROTE YESUNG AS THE VILLAIN.

but but, oh fuck. MY HEART, ITS BREAKING IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE. BECAUSE ONLY YOU CAN DO THAT TO ME ;___; ♥

Ok, negl, evil!Yesung is kind of hot.

You know, you're kind of the most versatile writer I've ever met. AND I ADMIRE AND IDOLIZE YOU AND OMG TEACH ME YOUR SEKRITTTSSSS ♥

Date: 2010-05-18 11:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xrosepetalsx.livejournal.com
Yesung's not completely the villian, he just comes across that way ;D

D: <333

I agree

LOL Do you mean pairing wise, or genre wise? xDD I used to be an angst whore and crack was not a part of my vocab, I don't know what happened, and it used to be once I found a favorite pairing, I looked for nothing else lol.

O///O I love you <3
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